1. Before borrowing money from a friend, decide whether you need more.
2. Death is hereditary.
3. There are three sides to every argument: your side, my side and the right side.
4. An expert is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.
5. Many things can be preserved in alcohol. Dignity is not one of them.
6. Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.
7. When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.
8. Cheer up, the worst is yet to come .
9. Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.
10. Well done is better than well said .
11. Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make them when nobody is looking.
12. Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
13. If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.
14. Where there's a will there are five hundred relatives.
15. Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die
